The Bottom Rail by verbal shredwright

Actions Speak Louder than Words

The most honest reflection of any society is how they treat the weakest and most vulnerable members of their own communities. You remember the sick, children, elderly, poor, etc. In the mountains hypocrisy is everywhere… on one hand there are world-class resorts, mountain mansions and more sparing no expense. And on the other hand you can trip over all kinds of local business associations, charities and fund raisers. So, how can towns with populations of only a few thousand and excessive resources let even one of their neighbors or employees in need fall the cracks? Exclusion and Excuses.

Exclusion is the number one form of bullying. Think about it. When you were in school you remember the kids who sat alone at the lunch table… or was always picked last at gym or recess. Why? Just because that kid was poor, different or had a disability, but that didn't matter… that just made them an easy target. So, if you're excluded and bullied when you try and go places… isn't it common sense to think you might stop trying and going out? And, in small mountain towns that means you might not feel welcome anywhere at all. The first thing bullies do is blame the person they are bullying. They judge others and find a justification for their bad behaviors.

Excuses are everywhere. The number one excuse "the mountains are transient". So, the family that has been living and working here for ten years suddenly disappears without telling anyone? Or another favorite… mountain doctors offices can call you anywhere on the planet to collect a $10 co-pay, but can't make a courtesy call to their heart, cancer or other patients of ten or more years who miss appointments? If our mountain communities want to be world-class we aren't going to get there by judging people, labeling people or leaving them out and making excuses about it. Ten years ago poor people with disabilities were told to take their problems and go away. And in some places that has not much has changed.

It starts with kids at school. It turns into exclusion from meaningful opportunities and income in the future. Out of sight out of mind. After being bullied and excluded all the time you come to expect it. You do know that you don't like how it makes you feel. But, bullies learn their behavior too… from their parents and schools to careers and business. Bullies want and need control over who they deem worthy of inclusion. The truth is most people don't even think they are doing it. And when people stand up for themselves they get labeled negative, toxic or worse. Stop worrying about the tone of someone's voice when they are struggling, and start concerning yourself with the content of what they are saying… Are they asking YOU for help?

When people stand up for themselves it's not like the movies. They don’t overcome and triumph in the end. The reason it's a movie is because that's not how real life is. Bullies fight back. They certainly don't want to be called out, because the truth hurts! Remember that's how you get labeled toxic, negative or bad for business. The difference is… this isn't high school anymore. These are real people with real lives who are struggling to live through no fault of their own. But, it's easier to blame them instead of listen to them. That's why bullies always point out the select people they chose to help, or wealthy families or individual who already own their home or business they can afford everything they need. Comparing apples to oranges is another excuse made by bullies to continue excluding and blaming those who are less fortunate for their circumstances.

Remember talk is cheap, and action will always speak louder than words. Judging people and talking about them behind their back is not solving problems… it makes them worse. Don’t claim you care about people and then judge and exclude them. Don't claim your door is open to everyone when it is not. Do not claim all life is priceless and then tell someone they cannot afford to live. Is that how you would want to be treated if you were in that position?

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